savage25: (Default)
Well, if you haven't already guessed by now, I haven't been active on LiveJournal for a long while. 22-weeks since my last update. My "paid account" expired yesterday, and I've made the decision to not renew.

LiveJournal was a great way of expressing myself and meeting new people over the past 5 years. I've found a new way of expressing myself and connecting with friends and family: "Facebook"
Paul Narsavage's Facebook profile

I won't be deleting my journal... just not going to be keeping it updated, or even pretend that I'm still active in it now.

I have lots of great memories and friends from LJ:
[ profile] bassbear - a cutie and his student quotes-of-the-day were always great to read
[ profile] bearpawly - his coming-out and many of his great entries have deeply affected me
[ profile] bigfundrew - his humor and family are so much a part of him and it shows (now on Facebook too)
[ profile] jkusters - always there to listen and give a hug (now on Facebook too)
[ profile] kev_bot - so smart and witty, truly an amazing guy (now on Facebook too)
[ profile] labelsdc - this fashionista and I are life-long friends now (now on Facebook too)
[ profile] shadowbearmn - the cats and humor and wit, and thanks for the pokes
[ profile] texaspenguin - he made it through medical school and kept his smile
[ profile] thepup & [ profile] cactusbear - so great to meet these guys in AZ, so much fun!
[ profile] thereisnofear - the sexxy, fun, and talented Kendall

If I haven't already, someday I hope to meet all of you in-person. I'll keep an eye out for you, and if you're on Facebook, be sure to "friend me".

[Edit: I just read through a bunch of friends posts. Facebook isn't the same... I do admit to missing LJ... reading & writing the entries here is much more creative... but... it also takes more time to read / write than a one-line status. Work has been busy, priorities change, etc.]


Mar. 23rd, 2008 02:48 pm
savage25: (Contemplative)
"Happy Easter"
or for the non-religious: "Hoppy Easter"

I haven't said that much this year... Easter has become a non-holiday for me over the past couple years. I feel a little strange about it this year.

Easter used to be one of the major holidays of the year -- I mean, religiously it's one of the highest holy days of the year... and growing up it meant getting all dolled-up for church and an hour-and-half service... and family dinners... and, of course, the non-religious aspects of it: Easter Bunny, hidden eggs, hidden Easter basket, candy, candy, toys, candy, etc.

It was a major day for me every year growing up -- probably second only to Christmas.

And now... now it's just another Sunday. In fact... I just signed off of work. I put in a few hours of work today, and I'm off to NYC this evening, and there's really nothing special about the day.

I saw this coming -- back when I became "too old" to search for hidden Easter eggs. (You know, 20 years-old or so *wink*) And, then when I started not considering organized religion as part of my beliefs, it took yet another dive in the "Holiday Hierarchy".

Today, I could care less about Easter. It means nothing to me... there's not a single Easter egg in the house... not a single bunny... not even a chocolate rabbit to bite the ears off of.

It saddens me a little actually.

I remember how it used to be: how exciting it was looking for the eggs and easter basket; how fun it was to dress-up for church and get "Spring clothes"; how nice it was to see family and eat a huge, scrumptious meal; the joy of seeing the first flowers of Spring.


I got a little Easter surprise from my mom & dad this morning -- a deposit into my bank account of some "candy money" so that I could go out and get Barry and I some Easter candy. I love my mom! :) It made me happy... and, I know if I lived in the same town as them, we'd surely have a basket of candy hand-delivered... and I'd probably even go to church with them...

Final thought: it just makes me wonder what's so special about Easter and why I'm sad... to me I think it means "family" more than anything... and so I'm left with this sadness that my family is not around me, and without them Easter really doesn't mean anything... and I'm left with one less reason to celebrate... one less holiday on my calendar... and I think that's what really saddens me the most: in today's day-and-age, when it's "GO GO GO", any lost day of "fun, family, relaxing, thankfulness, and joy" is a lost day indeed. :(
savage25: (Condolence)
Just wanted to post a quick little entry to recap the vacation weekend.

Barry and I drove to my parent's in West Virginia on Wednesday. Fairly easy drive... had a really good time with my parents and family. And Thanksgiving dinner went very well. There were 26 people -- my mom's side of the family... almost all of them. Barry was a major help in the kitchen, keeping everything cooking and making sure everything was ready on-time.

We made a video for my grandma (mom's mom) where everyone related their favorite "Holiday Memory" and wished her well -- since she lives in Florida and can't travel to be with everyone. It was really nice... now if we (Barry and I) can just get it burnt to a DVD -- darn software is not working quiet the way it should.

Black Friday was spent with family, sitting around and chatting... and a little shopping thrown in.

Barry and I drove back home on Saturday. We then went to Santa Saturday in New Hope... got there just as the main festivities were ending, but honestly, that was OK with me... seemed a bit (a lot) crowded, and I'm not sure I was really in the mood. We got to see Frank and David and have dinner with them... which was really nice. Also got to see one of the local bed and breakfasts (Wishing Well) where a bunch of guys from camp were staying. It was nice. My favorite room was the one behind the bookcase. I drove us home (as Barry was tired of driving since he drove all day, and because he had a bit more to drink than I).

Sunday night I went to my uncle's viewing. We buried Uncle Stanley today. He passed away on Wednesday morning... My father's brother... it was a really sad thanksgiving for that side of the family. I don't have too many memories of Uncle Stanley -- mostly that he was just a nice guy, and always talking about where he had been making his deliveries lately (deliveries for a produce company I believe). I remember him coming to our house in the country when I was very young to fill up milk jugs with our well-water... and me being scared by him... showing up when I least expected it or something. Now I look back and laugh and wonder why I didn't spend more time with him or talking with him. *sigh*

It was good seeing family and all -- just one of those "wish it was under better circumstances" kind of things.

Oh... yeah... and I got a speeding ticket on my way to the funeral. UGH.
savage25: (Fall)
I've never really been a big fan of Halloween.

As a kid growing up in a rural community, "Trick or Treating" consisted of putting on a costume, piling in the car, and being driven to relatives' houses. Once there, you had to do a song or joke before you'd get a piece of candy... followed by "visiting" and kissing grandma... then piling in the car and driving around more. At the end of the night, all that "work" got you about 10 pieces of candy and a buck or two.

I dreaded it.

Middle-School / High-School years brought some actual trick-or-treating once I was old enough to be allowed to walk around the nearby "town" with our cousin. It was amazing to me to knock on a door and get candy without having to have to do anything for it. There were still a few houses in the neighborhood that wanted the kids to tell a joke or sing a song or something... but not many.

Nowadays, I wonder if the kids even think about having a joke or something? It also irritates me that communities set days and times when the kids can walk around. What ever happened to Halloween Night being "the" night? And kids drive from community to community depending on what nights they each have "scheduled" for "Beggar's Night". *sheez!*

Oh... and the fact that scary movies and gore totally skeeve-me too doesn't help the fact that this is probably my least favorite "major holiday".

A friend at camp this weekend called Halloween a "Gay High-Holy-Day"... why? when did it become that? I don't think I'll ever conform to that theory. Perhaps when I was in high-school I could dress up like a girl and get away with it, and that was probably the best part... but does that really constitute it as a great "gay" day? If anything, it just makes it harder to spot the possibilities. [possible boyfriends, in-case that wasn't clear]

Oh well... I have to give Halloween some credit, as it does fall during my favorite time of the year [Autumn]... but honestly, Thanksgiving wins the title of "Fall Holiday" for me.

In other news, I coordinated my work team's "Pumpkin Carving / Decorating" contest and our team tied for first-place in the department. Let me tell you, there were some really great ideas. I think ours won because of how it tied-in a little bit of all our team members... that and the blood (aka shock-value). I'm waiting on a picture of it... but it was a pumpkin with a mean face, and an arm sticking out of it's mouth. The arm was on a bloody keyboard with a mouse eating it's thumb. Then we put things around it to represent the different members of our team.

I didn't dress-up in costume. I almost came in as "Heidi Ho"... It wasn't even that I was afraid of comments or anything... seriously, I think people would have loved it... but in all seriousness, I just didn't want people at work calling me "Heidi" for the rest of my days here. It would be one of those things that people would think was "cute" for years and I would think was "annoying" after ten minutes...
savage25: (Default)
My response to a posting by [ profile] bearpawly about video games brought up a lot of thoughts / memories / emotions in me...

I never really "got into" video games... I mean, yeah, I played them, but never really had a desire to own them and spend a lot of time on them. This carries through to today -- I have very little desire for a Wii or PS3 or anything like that. At-most, I would want it in the same way I'd want a board game -- something to play in a social situation. So I can't justify the cost of it for a rare party where people might want to play.

Back-in-the-day, I enjoyed tinkering with the text-based "adventure" games... but what intrigued me most about them was not the quest itself, but "how" it was done... the way the computer could "understand English" really captured my interest. So much so that I hacked one down and figured out how it worked and wrote a small one myself to prove (to myself) that I could do it.

The interactive-world games intrigued me too... but I couldn't really get-into them, mainly because I wasn't good at them, and that frustrated me. I'm kinda thankful that I wasn't too good at them and didn't want to spend the time in them... because if I had, I may NEVER have left the computer lab in college. There was this text-based multi-player game back before the World Wide Web became what it is... (back when "email" was "amazing"...) there were three or four people in the computer lab ALL THE TIME and occasionally you would hear one yell out to the other about some fantastic sword or kill he had just done or something like that. I just used to roll my eyes. Who knew that those multi-player games would morph into the graphically intense and exciting "worlds" of today.

They still intrigue me immensely... mainly still about "how they do it"... but, honestly, they also scare me a little. I guess I saw one too many "SciFi" or "Outer-Limits" or "Matrix" type shows where the world sinks into a truly "virtual world" and no one leaves the house or even remembers what human contact is like.

I often wonder what some of the kids today would do without their little handheld GameBoys and fancy games at home... "go outside? see the sun? talk to people?" OMG, what a concept? I wonder if the future president of the United States is out there right now playing "Mortal Kombat" or "Grand Theft Auto" and is she/he thinking that's what life is really like?
savage25: (Default)
Just saw Paris Hilton's video "Nothing in this World"... and for some reason it totally inspired me to make a journal entry. (Rambling deep thoughts...)

So in this video, a poor kid (aka dork) is getting bullied in school... but dreams of Paris Hilton being his girl... and then one day she moves in next to him... and he asks if she'll go to the school with him... and she does... and everyone's jaw drops... yada, yada, yada...
Cheesy, I know... but somehow... gave me the chills... and was just totally cute!
And they flashed the words "Dare to Dream"... what a great journal entry I thought.
Dork that I am... I still dare to dream.
I think sometimes (quite a bit recently) I think that I can't dream anymore... and that my old dreams are just never going to come true...
but then... sometimes... I think that perhaps my dreams have just changed... and that's OK.
But... the problem is when I don't dream anymore... or feel I can't...
that loss of hope... you know what I mean?
But there is hope, and there are dreams...
just lots of new dreams...
so don't get hung up on your old dreams... just because they were old dreams that may not have happened...
make up some new dreams...
just don't stop dreaming.

I've been distant from LJ for a while... There's several factors as-to why... some good, some not-so-good, and some just-because I'm busy... But I'm going to spend a few minutes catching-up on some LJ friends dreams now...
savage25: (Default)
That little red-headed chick -- Wendy -- serves up a mean hamburger, fries, soda, and frosty...

So, I'm not sure if it's just because I haven't had Wendy's in ages or what... but I just had an almost orgasmic experience with a frosty and some fries. *Yummmmmmy*

There's something about Wendy's that brings up all kinds of memories of High School... we had one next-door to our high school and used to hang-out there after school. That's where I first dipped a fry into my frosty and found out how good salt, potatoes, and chocolate icy go together. (Hey, don't squint your nose up at me if you haven't tried it.) It's also where I learned to play the "strute" (a straw-flute). I laughed so hard soda came out my nose. I imitated a teacher I hated and fell backwards in my chair, legs-in-the-air... friends laughing so hard that soda came out their noses. Got my favorite music teacher more than one "Biggie Ice Tea"... she was almost never seen without one.

Ahhh... good times... good times...

As I was on my way to lunch, saw a "Safety Checkpoint"... nearly broke my neck checking out the cops... Holy crap Bethlehem has some HOT officers.

On my way to work, I just had to go out of my way to go through the checkpoint. When the cop told me to stop, and handed me the card, and smiled and said, "We're just checking to make sure everyone is wearing their seat-belts today sir. Thanks." I nearly melted... Good lord... I wanted to go around the block just to go through again.


savage25: (Default)

January 2009



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